Mum was born in the village of Etherley but the family soon moved to the nearly town of Bishop Auckland, where her father, Fred, became a manager at the iron works. She was the oldest of three with a sister, Joyce and a brother Donald. She said that the family were very close and it was a very happy home. She was a bright student and surprised everyone by missing a place in the Grammar School at the interview stage. But after a spell at the secondary modern she transferred to the Roman Catholic convent school in Darlington.


In 1942 Mum gained a place to study History, Ancient History, and Latin at St Hild’s College, Durham University and then took the teaching diploma. During Rag Week in 1946 she met Leonard, her future husband, who was riding a donkey dressed as an Egyptian. She thought this a bit odd(!) but said yes when he asked her to tea - a first date in a relationship which lasted over 60 years.


Ironically, when she qualified, Mum’s first job was at the Grammar School which had rejected her!


She wanted to teach, so resisted getting married until 1950, when she joined Leonard in Manchester where he was a curate. Over their years together she bore stoically Dad’s need to keep changing jobs, even though it disrupted family life. But I do remember her putting her foot down when the chance of a move to Argentina came up, and later to Jerusalem.


The move to Manchester was the start of a long second career - as a clergy wife, something Mum took very seriously. As well as involvement in parish activities, including much work with the Mother’s Union, she took the lion’s share of bringing up 3 boys. This was especially so when the family moved to York in 1957 for dad’s new job with TocH. After building a new church in the new council estate in Wythenshaw, he was ready for a change. He was away a lot with the new role. 


Our’s was also a happy home with plenty of love and a lot of Christian ways. On Sundays it was Church, of course, and no shopping, no inappropriate activities. (Mum once told me off for model making in the garage on a Good Friday - my hammering nails into bits of wood was deemed ‘hardly appropriate, dear’).


IN 1962 Dad became a vicar again at St Peter’s church in Norton, East Yorkshire, and with us at school, Mum not only supported his ministry but also began teaching history part-time at St Andrews, a private girls school in Malton. She loved this role and was there for 21 years, eventually becoming Senior Mistress, and only finished when it was closed by the owners. She was well respected as a teacher and leader and kept in touch with many colleagues and pupils from the school. When her death was posted on the St Andrew’s Facebook there were many glowing tributes and comments from her ex-pupils.


While at Norton, Mum had a huge Red Letter Day when she and Dad were invited to one of the garden parties at Buckingham Palace. As a staunch, lifelong royalist and with a keen interest in all things royal this was a really special day.


But Dad couldn’t stay put: in 1974 he took on the role of Warden at Wydale Hall the diocesan conference centre near Scarborough. She again supported Dad in his work. She enjoyed the visits by Methodist groups because they would always sing hymns while doing the washing up, and many friends were made.


Eventually Dad wanted to be back in parish life before he retired so after 9 years at Wydale Mum was uprooted again to the village of Elvington outside York, where Dad had three churches to look after. Finally, in 1988 the couple retired to Woodthorpe in York.


Mum could now spend more time enjoying her family, which eventually included 5 grandchildren, all boys and scattered around the country. She and Leonard took each of them to see London or Edinburgh when they reached the age of 9 or 10. 


They would look after the youngsters to give us little breaks. Mum loved spending time with her family and was very proud of us all and of our achievements. We enjoyed holidays together to celebrate milestones such as a trip to Centre Parcs, Longleat, for Dad’s 75th birthday and gathered for many special birthdays and anniversaries.


Her lifelong interest in History led to many holidays in Europe and beyond, exploring the capitals and other historic sites such as Carthage, the Pyramids, the Holy Land, Greece and Troy. An intrepid traveller, she decided to visit her friend in France and took 10-year-old Adam to visit her German penpal in Cologne. 


Dad wasn’t always interested in the places she wanted to visit so she persuaded her dear sister Joyce to go with her on tours of China and of Russia. Poor Joyce had to endure Mum’s snoring and on one occasion was driven to trying to sleep in the en suite of their hotel room!


Mum’s Christian faith was such an important part of her life and reinforced her caring nature. In retirement she volunteered as a visitor for Age Concern for nearly 20 years. She was an active member of her church, St James the Deacon, in York, and supported both events and fellow parishioners. She always gave generously her love and support to her family and her friends.


Mum loved being in company and talking to people, hearing about their lives. She had strong views and was happy to debate and banter with anyone. She was always a supporter of women’s rights; the campaign for the vote was one of her favourite periods of history, and the only time she went on a demonstration was in support of the ordination of women priests in the Church of England. 


She had a passion for learning and was an enthusiastic member of U3A in York when she retired. She enjoyed classes in German, French and British Sign Language. She acquired a knitting machine and devised her own patterns for pullovers, and also took up lace making, notably supplying garters for the brides when her grandsons got married. She always had a book on the go, either history or historical novels and loved Strictly Come Dancing and period dramas and, of course Songs of Praise - nothing would stop her singing along.. She followed Downton Abbey closely. Her last proper trip out was when Cath and Joyce took her to see the Downton movie. She enjoyed this so much she wanted to go again.


Dad’s death in 2007 was a massive blow but, fiercely independent, she carried on with her life with the support of family, some very good friends, and the church. She continued driving (in spite of finding the kerb frequently getting in the way during left-hand turns) until breaking her good hip in 2013. This meant the loss of the car but the acquisition of a mobility scooter.


An old family friend visited shortly after she bought this and reported that she “was full of enthusiasm, just like a child with a new toy”.


The scooter gave her freedom, but on one occasion she steered into an overhanging pyracantha bush and, instead of reversing safely out, ploughed on through, ripping a deep and very bloody gash in her arm. Strong-willed as ever she refused to go to A & E and obliged her friend Carole to somehow dress the wound so she could go on the Age UK trip to Blackpool the following day!


In spite of her decreasing mobility Mum rarely complained, rather she kept trying to get back the what she had lost with physio visits and exercises, surprised that she wasn’t getting stronger even after advancing into her 90s and suffering thromboses in both legs. I would tease her about how her legs weren’t actually getting younger. She was determined to continue visiting her boys and enjoyed the weddings of 3 grandsons and even the Mothers Union annual conference when it was held in Nottingham.


Even when she became so frail that she agreed to move into a care home she was certain it was only temporary - until she was strong enough to have her own ‘little flat’.


I shall miss her cheery “Hello, love” when I’d go and visit, her sense of humour, and her warmth and kindness. Among the many condolence cards we’ve had is one from the Bishop of Selby who said “she was a person of character and strength and has left a special memory”.


Finally I’m going to read a little message she left for us. I know this was written at least 10 years ago, when she was writing notes for her funeral arrangements, because she added in the bit about great-grandchildren:


“This is goodbye to you all. Be kind to each other and try to keep in touch. To my darling grandsons and great-grandchildren a very big wish for your future success. Always remember that your respective parents have always done their best for you. You are very lucky. A special goodbye to Vanda, who the Lord sent when I was grieving after Leonard’s sudden death and who has been a loving tower of strength. May the Lord bless you all.”